TTC, Here is my story, can I hear yours?

nmarstall Posted: 03-04-2010 3:04 PM

Hi, my husband and I have been not really TTC but not preventing it for most of our marriage.  But have actively been TTC for 3 years.  Got pregnant a few months after we got married in 2003 then miscarried, then a year ago found out I was pregnant and then miscarried.  We are working with fertility docs right now, but they don't know what is causing our problem.  So I am kind of at a stand still right now.  Have done IUI treatments, no IVF cause that is expensive. LOL  So let me know your story if you feel like sharing it.

Scoutie replied on 03-04-2010 3:10 PM

I hope your journey will end with a baby really soon!

I started TTC in 2004, realized after just three months of charting, that my luteal phase sucked (six days). Because of charting, I was able to know there was a problem right away and get to the RE. I conceived my ds on the third round of Clomid. He was born in 2005. We didn't prevent pregnancy, and I hadn't gotten pregnant on my own, so I went back to the RE. Three rounds of Clomid again, and they all failed. I took a break the next month and got pregnant on my own, although I believe that the Clomid was still helping things along.  My dd was born in 2007. Since I didn't think I could get pregnant on my own, we didn't prevent, and I found myself pregnant in November of 2008, only to miscarry at six weeks. We prevented pregnancy   by me simply being aware of my fertility signs, and then decided to try again. I made an appointment with the RE in July of 2009, only to find myself pregnant two days before the appointment. That pregnancy ended at 21 weeks, when my water broke. I gave birth to him on Halloween and he died shortly after birth.  Because of this sad ending, I'm really scared to try again, but somebody is missing in our family and I feel if I don't try, I'll regret it. I'm 36, and don't have all the time in the world. I see an RE on Monday.

Steph_clueless replied on 03-11-2010 5:02 AM

We have been TTC since January 2007 - when I was still 33 and though that the time was right and all that... And naive as yu are you I saw myself with eiher a baby or a bump under the Christmas tree at the end of the year.

Well, didn't really work like that. I had been using the Nuvaring as contraceptive for 2.5 years by then. I stopped using it, period was back straight away, 28 days all picture perfect. After 3 months I srtaed spotting before my period - whoch I had bever done before. Went straight to the GP as I was concerned about it but all they said was "well, if you are trying the conceive, you have to be trying before we can investigate (this is the UK....)".

I didn't understand why the spotting wouldn't even be looked at no matter of I was TTC or not - but so nothign happened for over a year even tjough I went back. asking questions etc. Meanwhile I wasn't spotting for 2 or 4 fdays, or 5 or 8 before AF, no I started at ovulation, kept bleeding until AF, had AF for the best art of 6 or 7 days and then had 6 or 7 days before it would start all over again. In Sepember I had a first bout of severa back pain, crippling really which slwoly eased but never completely left.

Then the year was up and I wne t back to the GP and was told that they would have to test my partner first, semen and all - what on earth has that got do to with me bleeding 2/3 to 3/4 of the month?????

Partner had to wait THREE months for the semen analysis and after that they tested for ovulation and so on, still ignoring spotting, bleeding etc...

Finally, in September 2008 I saw the consultant for the first time. More blood tests were ordered and he brushed my carfully recorded charts away, temperature is rubbish, forget it... Wasn't interested at all. Then ultrasound, oh you have got chocolate cysts, another ultrasound, HSG, tubes are free and unblocked...

And still me bleeding away. And more back pain and pain during intercourse as well - which all does't reall yhelp when you should be at it all the time to make sure you don'yt miss one egg!!!

In March 2009 during the next appointment I broke down, cried and shouted at him, telling him that I had come to a point where I didn't care about preganancy anymore but that I wanted my life back, no bleeding anymore, no pain. He was shocked and performed a cryocautery in my cervix two minutes later which was excruciatingly painful. Bleeding stopped that months but came back the next, not as bad but still 4 to 6  days and more.

With my charting I was pretty sure that I did ovulate but he wanted to put me on a course of clomid anyway. Due to the cysts though he sent me for an MRI can and had blood test to check for ovarian cancer  - CANCER. Nice, thanks. He wanted to make sure I would be ok with the clomid as it can cause trouble if you're ovaried are funny anayway. All this came back clear, probably no cancer after all.

Two more blood tests to check if I was ovulating. I knew I was. then happnene dto have an appointment on day 14, he examined me and said - oh that looks as if you would be ovulating very soon. All I could say was " I KNOW!!! I know my body by now and have been charting - not only the temperature - for over 3 years now!!!

I had read numerous books by then and ended up discussing options with him. I asked him about endometrisis, my back and abdominal pai, pain during intercourse and basically self-prescribed a laparoskopy for me to investigate it.

I also decided to rather than sit on a waiting list and WAIT for thm to do things, to take mtters in my own hands. I started accupuncture in January 2010 which has been working well for me and which has reduced the spotting to nothing or only 1 or 2 days. I had a laparoskopy only yesterday which found numerous patches of endometriosis which the lasered away - and so I will now see if that will improve the overall situation.

They will put us in the IVF waiting list - but somehow I am not keen to go that way- here in the North of Scotland, I will have to travel over 2 hours one way to the performing hospital and somehow life is already stressfull enough without that.

I will carry on with accuounture and also try chinese herbs, possibly hyonotherapy in the near future if I have got neough cash... I am nearly 37 now, haven't been pregnant a single day, period wasn't late once - and I do srtat to wonder where this goes...

To make things espcially akward I am obviously surrounded by pregnant women and new babies which just seem to be everywhere - and a month ago my brother called and told me - fuling utmost guilty, that he would be a Dad in October. Yes I am happy for him - but hell, they haven't even tried. I wasn't planned and nothing.

And here we are, trying for nearly 3.5 years now and I don't think that I will be bale to acceot that we can't or won't have any children of our own. I wanted at least two, better four - and maybe we are not even getting one.

But we will keep trying.... Like most of us.

KrysTTC replied on 03-11-2010 12:13 PM

Hello and best wishes

I got married to my DH December 2001, so we've been together quite some time now. We decided we wanted to start for a family in the beginning of 2003, so I got off birth control pills. Unfortunately I didn't get a period... 10 months later had my period induced by provera and experienced psycho periods after, typical of my PCOS though. It made it rough trying to conceive. End of January 2005 (four months of clomid) I found out I was pregnant, but miscarried at 6 weeks pregnant. I stopped clomid, pretty much said screw TTC and focused more on myself.. a few months later I was pregnant again and carried my beautiful DS to term.

Now TTC #2 we decided to start April 2007... got off birth control... and you guessed it, no periods again. Took 9 months to get my first period on my own. Got pregnant in the beginning of September 2009 without help.. and miscarried at 6 weeks pregnant again.

So that's where I'm at. Although my TTC time is really a little less since my husband from 2003-2009 was on a submarine so he went out 2x a year for 2-3 months, which of course kills TTC 100% of the time. So we're waiting to see what the next step is.. got a referral to someone who can deal with infertility more (not IUI yet) and figured we'd get SA and HSG and all that fun tests done to see what is going on and give medicated cycles a chance or two for a while.

jbizzy replied on 03-11-2010 1:17 PM

Dh and I quit *not preventing* in March of 2006, after a year or so of nothing we moved on to the sperm meets egg method and opks.  A year of that and nothing we moved on to clomid for 4 cycles because my progesterone came back at 7.  Then we did lots of blood tests, an HSG, two SA's, two IUI's, charting,  5 more cycles of clomid and lots of experiementing with herbs like maca & yam root. 

October of 2009 I had a myomectomy laparotomy to remove 4 fibroids and light endo.  I was off work for six weeks recovering (it's much like a c-section) and was told to wait two cycles to try again.  December we decided would be our last month trying and we made an appointment with an adoption agency for January 4th.  We went to the appointment and really liked the Agency and were totally geeked about the prospects of adoption.  I called my 401 people to get the ball rolling to borrow against it so we could start our family.  January 9th I got my first ever positive on a pregnancy test.  Now I am 12 weeks and feeling very blessed.

I never thought it would happen.  I continue to pray every night for my friends who suffer with IF so that they may get their miracle soon too. 

TickTock replied on 03-11-2010 7:03 PM

I started charting and learning about my cycle a little over a year ago when I married my husband.  I have found charting to be very empowering, as I have never had one of those 28-day-clockwork cycles.  Now that I know my cycle and my body, I can at least predict what day I will get AF based on my O-date, for the first time in my life.

I am 37 years old, and my husband is 39.  Neither of us has been married before and neither of us has any children.  I never wanted children until I met my husband, and then it was like someone turned on a switch.  I think I just needed to find the right guy to start my clock ticking.

My husband and I work different shifts, so we don't get much time together.  We started TTC when we first got married, but things got stressful for various reasons and we decided to take a break.  We started TTC again a few months ago, but we have had no luck so far.  Because of my age, my doctor told me not to put off getting checked out if we don't conceive after 6 months of trying.  So, I have my first fertility appointment in a month.  I'm kinda nervous about it.

All the women in my family have gotten pregnant very easily.  I have lived a good part of my life in fear of an unplanned pregnancy because of it.  It is very bizarre for me to now be faced with the possibility of not being able to get pregnant after what I've had in my mind all these years. 

I am trying very hard to remain optimistic, but it's getting harder with each appearance of AF.